User blog:Wildoneshelper/Everything's Wrong With Fifa 14 in Mobile Device in 100 points or fewer

After Odus's trial, it's time for Fifa 14! How many points could I get?


 * 1) 13 seconds of logos
 * 2) "EA Sports, it's a game!" Yeah, it's a game. Does that mean you can make laggy servers and mediocre players?
 * 3) "Tap to continue" Unnecessary commands
 * 4) Games of the week always refreshes every week. Then, if you don't update it, you won't be able to play anything free offline.
 * 5) Squads are not in there best shapes.
 * 6) Liverpool still has Suarez.
 * 7) Suarez won't bite.
 * 8) Well, the games of the week should be a game of rivalry. However, the match is categorized as "friendly".
 * 9) Team of the week don't have full chemistry.
 * Ads
 * 1) Kick off needs money to unlock
 * 2) QPR still in championship
 * 3) Commentary needs to be downloaded
 * 4) No Van Gaal in Fifa 14
 * 5) No Turk Lig (except Galatarsaray) means no Dirk Kuyt.
 * 6) Auto tackle sucks in beginner. No auto tackle sucks in professional.
 * 7) Well big buttons are necessary, because you would accidentally bump into other buttons which would result in ridiculous and embarrassing moves.
 * 8) Loading Ultimate Team takes quite a long time
 * 9) Also, you would be automatically disconnected from the EA servers when you have not played the game for hours.
 * 10) The game restarts again after you make a phone call and stay in the contact list for a long time.
 * 11) A game contract is deducted by the disconnection of the game.
 * 12) Contracts are too expensive.
 * 13) Cristiano Ronaldo is too expensive.
 * 14) Ain't nobody got enough money to buy Lionel Messi!
 * 15) Well, even I have to pay 2000 for Giroud!
 * 16) People raise the money a lot for a single player, but nobody buys my ****ing players!
 * 17) You need to go back to the main menu to toggle the controls.
 * 18) Well, while I was typing this point, the commentary is still downloading.
 * 19) Semi-pro is too difficult when your team is too weak.
 * 20) Actually a bronze team of players is significant when you don't want to waste your bloody money on contracts.
 * 21) Beginner difficulty gives you the most money for a single match.
 * 22) It's a miracle that I've beaten a club in World Class difficulty by 2-0 full time.
 * 23) World Class Cup is too difficult for a beginner.
 * 24) It takes forever to download a commentary.
 * 25) Chelsea is the next Brazil. Slain that club by 18-0 in beginner difficulty, 3-minute half time.
 * 26) Sometimes you don't know why great clubs don't get 5-star rating.
 * 27) Clive Tyldesley and Andy Townsend
 * 28) In beginner difficulty, sometimes the opponent passes the ball back to you.
 * 29) You could literally shoot from anywhere on target unless the power bar doesn't show up in beginner.
 * 30) Cheering sounds last for just only a few seconds.
 * 31) The commentary is broken.
 * 32) Celebration scene does not contain Hakuna Matata dance.
 * 33) Smart referee cliche
 * 34) Referees are not always smart. Sometimes they issue a yellow card when the tackle doesn't even hit the opponent.
 * 35) Commentators don't say the players' names.
 * 36) Sometimes if the opponents get the ball back when you slide the opponent badly. There will be no free kick and no card, which is unfair to the opponents.
 * 37) More red cards for just a little bit bad foul.
 * 38) Goalkeepers are kinda shabby.
 * 39) Every time the players shoot ground balls. It seems an easy job for goalkeepers but they don't grasp the chance.
 * 40) Well if you want to shoot higher balls, you need more time. By that time, the goalkeeper has collected the ball.
 * 41) Sometimes the buttons could not sense my pressing. I sometimes need to rap that button in order to make it work again.
 * 42) There is an "invisible string" when you try to move a player to your preferred direction. However, this string breaks when you are too far. Feels good to play on console...
 * 43) Why can't we play Ultimate Team offline?
 * 44) Damn stamina (fitness)...
 * 45) Every player is "basic".
 * 46) On the field, many players have the same face.
 * 47) No "Toilolo"
 * 48) The game won't let me tackle. Sometimes slide tackles don't even touch the ball. You can't even slide from near.